sometimes u just do not know how to deal with it
is very contradict with the normal talkative me but in this case i rather sit there and listen
telling myself not to think too much but i failed
the deeper i thought about it, the more and more negative thinking arose
i know is just my foolish thinking playing my emotion
in real life..no one actually bother to think in such way about you
care too much about my public awareness...YES..undeniably i am
whether i am consciously doing so or not
even though i seldom show it but i know i am such a person
not really a confident people who is high in self-esteem
although i hope to appear so, there is definitely a cognitive dissonance between my real self and ideal self
ok..analysis myself again..ignore my jargon
maybe i am indeed a negative person even though i do not admit so
sometimes i looked back on myself i can really see the negative me
such me do not always appear...at least not in front of certain friends but quite often at other groups perhaps
constantly reviewing myself is kinda tiring but yet i often engage in doing so
really a crazy fellow studying psychology
disguising yourself is exhausting and i do not think that i am a good actress in real life
at least in a play, u know that u have to play that role and just act that way...there is a reason
in real life, somehow we disguised ourselves here and there...to a certain extend
i know my body language always done a good job betraying my feeling..yet i felt lazy to hide it
to act that u are enjoying but in fact u r not is just too hypocrite for me
i rather being seen that: ok! she is bored!
haha...maybe that is why i can sometimes easily being viewed as negative
cause i do not really bother to hide my negativity
well...i am who i am right
to change my behavior to be seen as a optimistic person despite the fact that at that moment i am in a terribly bad mood is just not me
in short i am just a selfish person who cares a lot about my own feeling
i am not any noble people i know
i am just a very normal human being who often think that i am a special ones to him/her
however i am too familiar with self-serving bias and i know that is just a common wrong perception
is kinda saddening when you learn about psychology....u know that u r clearly cheating yourself to make u feel good...u know it very well and u are aware of them
still when u did it....u will know how silly n stupid u are
u are too realistic to ask yourself to believe in the lies that can made u feel better
because you know too well that is just that ur mind playing with you to protect your inner self
i only learnt about very basic stuffs....forgive me if i sounds to be being very professional
No comments:
Post a Comment